Let’s get one thing straight. I am neither a Cubs nor a Dodger fan. That Chicago traded Greg Maddux to L.A. is a roaring matter of indifference to me. The league is lucky to have the Cardinals, who provide the only real entertainment to fans worldwide.
However, Mr. Maddux does cheer me with his dogged commitment to one of baseball’s fundamental, non-negotiable elements: the stirrups (or the appearance of them). I absolutely hate those stupid pants that have infected baseball. In what universe does any player think that ground-dragging pants serve the best interests of baseball? They get on my nerves as much as gas stations whose “8” is upside down on their sign. If you want to wear pants to play sports then take up bowling or golf. Otherwise, wear real baseball pants with stirrup-laden socks. Anything else is just plain stupid. (Don’t get me started on basketball “shorts,” which are really koolats with stripes.)
Steroids are not baseball’s biggest threat. Fancy pants are. They threaten the integrity of the game and all things sacred about baseball. I submit that anyone having worn them should be barred from the Hall of Fame. What’s next? Pink jerseys and lace lettering? Visors instead of caps?
Thank you, Greg Maddux, for remaining a true baseball man. It’s unfortunate that you were never a Cardinal. Spending a career in the minor leagues is tough. So keep your pants on; we need someone like you.